Challenege

I have decided to take the Orange Rhino Challenge to not yell at my kids for a certain amount of time. I haven't decided if it is going to be a month or a few more then that. I would love to do a whole year but I figured I could take it a few months at a time. As I accomplish one month or two and so and so on I figured I could make a new goal to take it to the next level. So I think I might do it for three months. This way I can take the challenge quarterly.I will admit I have gotten really bad at screaming and I can tell that our home isn't as calm as it use to be. I need to restore the balance and give my kids a sanctuary from the awful things that are happening outside our home. They need a place of peace, not a place that they fear. So starting today I choose to stop yelling at my kids. If you want more info about the Orange Rhino Challenge, there is a link on my blog under favorite websites. It is an awesome blog! I will try to post my successes and my set back.

3 weeks!

I have been exercising for three weeks straight. It is awesome. My body is getting tighter, my clothes are fitting looser. I feel better about myself. I love muscle. It looks gorgeous. I am even starting to eat better which is helping. Soon I will be able to get a new wardrobe. Yeah! Go me!

Struggles

Why is it when you try to do your best it seems it is harder to succeed. Satan does his best to attack what little hope we have and I guess we have to hold on tight to what we have to make it through the storm. The only thing that gets me through it is my Heavenly Father. Even when I screw up and scream and yell he never gives up on me. He waits for me to calm down. I have to fight the darkness and God might be there but I have to meet him half way or at least put effort into.

I feel like all I have done in the last 4 years is struggle. I would love to have a breather before I am hit up with another task at hand. I guess it's for my own personal growth but at times I feel that if I get hit with one more thing that I will drown. I can't seem to find balance. I try to balance but it seems all the things I want to do go down the drain. I guess I am just complaining but I need to let my negative thoughts out so that I can make room for new ones that are more positive.

My kids know how to push my buttons and it seems they never let up. I try so hard to be a good mother but they never give me a second to breathe before they hit me with another tantrum or so form of annoyance. Oh I love my kids but I have such a hard time focusing when they whine non stop for days. I am drowning and I can't seem to find my way out. Thanks for letting me whine. It helped.

Best News Ever

I have wonderful in-laws. They are going to take my kids for three days. I am so excited. I can finish up all my painting projects and clean my house and relax and spend time with my husband. I am so excited!!!!!!!!!!!

P90X

I am starting P90X next week and I am scared to death. I am not in perfect shape but I believe I will pass the fit test and then will be stepping up to workout so hard. My husband and I will be doing it together which I think it will help because we will both be trying to eat healthy and exercise everyday. We are in the process of preparing for a very intense 90 days. So wish me lucky! If anyone else is starting P90X we can form a support team.

What A Week!

I just quit my job so that I could be a full time mommy again, which is exciting. It also means I will have time to exercise again and to eat better. This has been a long week and I only had the chance to work out once. I needed my sleep this week. But now that it is over I can start up again what I love to do the most. Being a mom and exercising. Heres to a great next week!

Week 1

I tried the hcg diet but it wasn't for me. I got cranky and tired when I couldn't eat much and it was hard to make meals for my entire family when I couldn't eat them. I have decided I am going to lose weight the old fashion way. Eating right and exercising. Sure it will come off slower but it is healthier and it is what I can do.

I have started a program called ChaLean's Extreme. This will be my second time doing it and it is effective. I lost 20 lbs the first time I did this program but then life happened so I got side tracked for a little bit. I was not happy, I was struggling to make it through the day, I wasn't being a good mother, wife, you name it. I had lost my confidence that I had gained over those few short months. I don't know what happened but one day I decided I couldn't take it anymore. I am not sure how I shook the shadows away but whatever it was it feels great.

I have started working out with my husband every morning at 6 am. Having a partner to exercise has helped. Doing it alone is tough, its doable but I have accomplished more this week then I have in a really long time. I also have great friends who walk with me a couple times of the week.

It may be that since my husband doesn't do homework at night anymore I get more sleep, or it might be because I don't have to work on the weekends anymore. It make be a combination of these things but I know this one thing to be true, God has never left my side. I haven't been the nicest lately but he never left. He stayed with me during my dark walk. I could not have survived if it hadn't been for Him. He has guided me to the decisions I have made to be a better mother, a better wife, a better person. I can't remember the last time I have felt the spirit so strongly, then I have this week. It has been a great week. It has reminded me that I am a daughter of God. That is what has gotten through each day. One day at a time.

A new year

It's a new year. Last year was good in terms of weight loss. I lost 20 pounds. Now I am struggling to get into a habit of exercise again because of the lack of it during the holidays. The holiday's really mess with me. Now I am working so I am having an even harder time fitting into my schedule. Maybe if I write everyday I will be more likely to accomplishing my goals. Anyway here is to a new year!

Melting away

I have lost a total of 17 pounds in 4 months. I have never felt better. My old clothes are looser and I feel great. The last time my body lost weight was when my daughter was 6 months old. I lost five pounds and then I found out I was pregnant again. I never really got to lose the Kaitlyn weight and the Skyler weight before I got pregnant with my third. Now I am 7 pounds from losing all of the Aaron weight then onto Skyler weight and then onto Kaitlyn weight. I know I have named my weight but it how I reach my goals. Once I reach my before weight with one of my children, then I move onto the next. It feels so great to be reaching goals. I love how my clothes hang loosely. It makes me feel like I am accomplishing something. Go Me! If you work hard and stick with your goals then you can accomplish anything.

Oh Yeah!

I have lost ten pounds! Hurray! I love it. I still have more to lose but I am losing weight faster then I did with my last two children. Muscle burns fat baby! My arms and legs and butt all have muscle in places I haven't had in awhile. It is great! I didn't even need a membership to lose the weight. I love to exercise. Sorry I had to brag. I feel so great and sore! I love being sore especially when I get results and I can see the results. Have a great day!

Improvement

It has been a month since I have started my Chaleans extreme. When I first started exercising I took photos and then I am suppose to take more every thirty days. Well it has been 30 days and man in a month I have slimmed down very nicely. There is room for importmant. But to see a difference has really made me start to like what I see in the mirror. My face is thinner, my hips and thighs are slimming and firming up. I am starting to have shoulders again. I might actually be able to put on a bathing suit this summer. I am way excited for the next phase in my program. I am in the push phase now and can't wait till I can look at those pictures and see an even greater improvement. I would post the pictures but I am not wearing very much and wouldn't want to scare anyone. I am just glad that I am really doing it after 4 years of struggling to lose the weight. Weight lifting is great. Muscle burns fat. Muscle also doesn't bulk you up especially when you workout with the program I am doing. I have lost about 6 inches on my body in 4 weeks. I am way excited. I am sure I would have lost more weight if I had eaten perfectly. But even though I didn't I am still on the road to success. I don't think I would have been able to do all this if it hadn't been for the support of my wonderful husband. I couldn't have asked for a better husband. He is the most wonderful man ever.

Exercise

Weight training is wonderful. My body has muscles in places I never had muscles before. This program I am on is really great. I am learning to eat less and I am exercising and pushing myself. Chalene's extreme is an excellent program. After I am done following this program I might try her turbo jam. Lucky for me my sister in law has that program. They can be a little pricey but so worth especially if your are like me and don't like to work out in front of people. I wanted to get a gym membership but the program I am doing is just as good or even better then going to workout at the gym. I am not losing as much weight as I would like but in this program I am doing, I should start to lose more weight towards the end. Anyway great program.

I Am Doing It!!!!!!!!!!

Finally after two months of working out I am starting to lose weight. I have lost 3 pounds so far this week and it feels great. Seeing the scale go down has pumped me up. I wasn't losing weight at all and it was really upsetting me. Sure you may say it is only three pounds but to me that is great since with my last two pregnancies it took me almost 6 months to start seeing results. I am weight lifting and doing cardio and I am also eating better. Even when I slip up it isn't as mad as it has been before. So I feel great. So all you who are trying to lose weight don't give up. I almost did and I am glad that I didn't.

At Least I Am Trying

It has been awhile since I wrote about my new weight loss goal. I have done pretty well. I am exercising at least one a day three times a week. I wish it was more but sometimes we get too busy or I am just am way too tired. I am try not to eat like a glutton but sometimes it doesn't work. I might not have heavy snacks in the house but when I am stressed I get into the 100 calorie snacks and eat two or three. It makes me feel real guilty other then that at least I am working out.

I have decided to try and get up at 5:30 every morning and workout. My husband doesn't leave till 6:25 to catch the bus so I would have time to work out with out my children waking up and getting in my way. I have succeeded yet getting up early but I just made the plan yesterday.

Today so far I have had cereal, which is was sugary so not a good start to the day. I also have had a sandwich and a pudding cup. The sun is out so I have been more distracted. I spend a portion of my day outside laying on the grass watching my children play and making sure they don't squash my two month old. Well for all those trying to stay fit and loss weight my only advice is don't give up. Even if you slip and mess up. Keeping plugging away. We are human and it takes practice to get this down.

The Beginning

Starting today I will be keeping track of the things I eat, and drink. I also will be making notes on how I feel. That way I can see what helps and what doesn't. I can't seem to keep up writing in the notebook. I seem to be able to just push it aside. I am on the computer a lot so I might as well use my time keeping track of things that are important to me so that I can keep to my goals. I will lose all the weight. Even if it does take two or three years. I need to feel good about myself. I love to exercise but I need to be able to keep myself on top of my feelings and my habits so that I can kick my health into turbo mode. I didn't know at first if I was going to let this be know to all but maybe I will inspire others or maybe you can help me stay honest with myself.

Today I have eaten:

yogurt, an apple, almonds,(4) 100 calorie cookie snacks ( I actually didn't mean to eat this many. I grabbed the wrong thing but didn't realize it before it was too late), a grilled cheese sandwich,(1)100 calorie cheez-its, 64 oz of water,two spoons worth of cottage cheese, salad and sunflower seeds.

So far it has been a good day for not eating fating foods. I walked on my treadmill for 20 minutes. Well slightly jogged as well. I love exercising. It clears my head.It helps me to feel calm. It makes me realize that life isn't so bad and I may have overreacted over things that were pointless.

I love feeling sore because I know it is working.

I also have taken a multi vitamin, and a super b complex vitamin. My mom is really into vitamins and has gotten me into them. I am trying to replenish after having three children. Normally I take Super B complex, prenatals ( it keeps my nails nice and my hair growing faster.), I also take zinc, calcium, magnesium. My mom says they help with anxiety. I let you know how it works after a few months of taking them everyday. Well I guess that is all for today.

Ramblings of a Mother of Three

Why are we given so many hormones? It doesn't seem fair. Finally after two weeks of crying, anxiety, and other emotions I feel like I am starting to find some stability. Next week will be the true test to see if I am semi back to normal. It will be the first week that I will have all three kids home with me alone. It has me a little freaked out but I think it is because I nurse my baby like 6 times a day and that takes some time that by the time I get to the other kids I don't have time to clean. How do you balance three kids and housekeeping and sleeping. I think sleep is so important that I would rather go to bed with my kids so that I can be stable the next day.

Oh how do you do it? I guess I will just have to teach my kids to help me. That is spending time with your kids and teaching them a valuable lesson on keeping things neat. If we work together we will have more time as a family and I am less likely to be cranky because my house is clean.

Oh Spring is in the air. I love how it has been sunny for almost a week straight. The sun is such a nice mood stabilizer. When it is sunny I tend to be more cheerful and life doesn't seem so bad when it bright and warm outside. Since my baby is still so little I can't go far from my home. So having the sun out allows me to take the baby outside to clear my head and be away from my house for a little bit. I think God is really taking care of me. He knows how I handle things and he has blessed me with sunshine so that I can stay semi sane. I love how he is always looking out for me.

Trust

"I would that ye should remember, that as much as ye shall put your trust in God even so much ye shall be delivered out of your trials, and your troubles, and your afflictions, and ye shall be lifted up at the last day." Alma 38:5

I have always believed that we are never given trials that we can't overcome. At times I forget this. There are times when I feel so down that I think how can I go on. But as I was reading this scripture, I realized that Satan wants me to believe I can't overcome the things I am going through. Reading the scriptures, the Ensign and other church materials I have always found a comfort that lifts that ugly dark cloud over my head. I find peace in the gospel. It is always the one thing that can lift my spirit. It strengthens my faith and gives me hope that one day I will be over certain trials. We have to have enough faith and trust in our Heavenly Father to have our trials delivered from us. It doesn't mean that we will be given an easy way out. I think it means that our trials will be lightened and that we will one day overcome our trials even if it is in the last day. If we endure to the end God will bless us for all we have done in this life that is righteous. Our gospel is precious and true.

Pregnancy

I have six weeks left and I don't know how I am going to make it. I am already having contractions, I feel nausea all the time, and I have no room to breathe. I am a baby. How do women do it? This is my third pregnancy and it seems like I forget what it was like the last time pregnancy so I decide I want another one and then realize half way through the pregnancy that I am crazy. How did Eve do it? She has it even harder. She didn't even have a doctor. She had Adam. I think if Dan had to deliver our children he would pass out before the baby came. I am excited for the baby. I watch all these mothers at church smiling at their babies or playing with them or feeding their babies and I miss that. My two children are so independent that cuddling with mom is out of the question. The only time they need me is when they are fighting over toys or to change their diapers or to feed them. I want some one to need me but also someone who wants me to hold them.